February the month of love and changes

Whenever there is a significant life change afoot, every nerve cell in your body is attuned to its every nuance. You can't help but notice things like a friend moving from one state to another. Or a child who may make a career change. We know inherently that these events will impact us and we feel the ripple effects of them in obvious ways, good and bad. Because we expect them, if nothing else.


The changes that thrill me, though, are the sudden ones, like having your baby get engaged right in front of your eyes whereas you start crying. The ones you embark on purposefully, but don't see the fruits of with the urgency of instant gratification. The ones that evolve almost imperceptibly over a period of time, until all at once you notice them and wonder, "heeeeyyyy...when did that happen?"

A few of those revelatory moments hit home with me this past month, and I think I'm liking what I see. What I feel. It's very hard to articulate, but I sense things shifting in undeniable ways that are gaining the strength of crystalline clarity with every passing day.


Change is freeing if you let it be. If it's the right kind of change. An acceptance. A state of mind. A moving forward. Tiny steps adding up to a journey you didn't realize with the full attention of your consciousness that you were on, but leading somewhere wonderful, and energizing, and captivating, and maybe - just maybe - somewhere gratifying, all the same.

This month, unexpectedly, I was given a brief unobstructed view of the path laid out in front of me. The effect of ongoing effort; changes, starting to culminate in exciting new beginnings.

I'm still having my moments of sadness over my sister but the universe keeps throwing good things at me to keep me going on the yellow brick road. I am starting to feel that I am getting older as I see my girls growing and going in there different life paths. It is a moment that I look forward to and am saddened by at the same time - what I would give to have them little again just to love them even more.


I'm just going to roll with it a while and see where it takes me.

The night walked down the sky with the moon in her hand.
~ Frederick L. Knowles

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
~ Robert Frost

And then there was three......My sweet baby bunny, Happy Birthday!!!

THERE was once a velveteen rabbit, and in the beginning she was really splendid. She was fat and bunchy, as a rabbit should be; her coat was spotted brown and white, she had real thread whiskers, and her ears were lined with pink sateen.................................

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Mommie. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a mom loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."


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My little bunny has been real to me since the day she was born. Coming in third with a tired mother and two older sisters she was never under loved. In fact she was the baby that brought us all together, with her smiles, laughter and never ending hugs we clung to. Life would not be the same if not for her.

I love you sweet baby (and you will always be). Mommie

HIPPO, BIRDIE TWO EWES - NANNIE

It seems like only yesterday that I held you in my arms for the first time, looking down at your tiny little face, fascinated by the miracle of you. You were so beautiful. I fell head over heels, madly in love with you at first sight, filled with wonder and awe and thankfulness at your presence in my life. Over the years, those feelings have never wavered. They've only intensified and deepened, grown and flourished; as I've had the privilege to watch you blossom from babe in arms to girl to woman right before my eyes.

Today, I'm overwhelmed, awash in memories, overcome with joy, and filled with pride like I've never known before. Proud of you for the obvious, but aware that today is really just symbolic of the moments, large and small, that led you here. I've seen you transform through sheer will and courage from a shy, unsure little girl into a strong, confident woman. I've witnessed you invest everything you have - blood, sweat and tears - into being the absolute best you can be, at everything you decided to do.

I've watched your thoughtful heart expand, never losing sight of the oh, so many people who have loved you, held their breath for you, and cheered you along the way. I've watched all of those hopes and dreams I held in my heart for you that day twenty-three years ago come true. And I've been honored as you've shared with me the hopes and dreams of your own.

I don't think it would be possible for me to be any prouder of you than I am today. You did it, baby. The world is yours for the taking, for all your hard work and struggle. Today is the first day of the rest of your life, your future is a blank page waiting for you to write your own story on it. And I can't wait to read it, as it unfolds one chapter at a time, a tale of a remarkable woman on the journey of her lifetime.

I feel like I should be filling this letter with words of advice, some sage wisdom full of guidance. But really, all I have to say is this: Follow your heart, chase your happiness. Above all else. Because of the woman that you've become, you will understand that this won't always be easy, and that there will be bumps in the road along the way. But I also believe you will know that pursuit of anything less isn't worthy of the trip.

I love you, from the bottom of my heart to the depth of my soul. Keep that in your heart forever, wherever you go, whatever you do, and know that this love is one true thing you always have to count on, yesterday, today and for all of your tomorrows.